Weight Loss Goals!

130 Pounds...Yep, I can do it! Est. 12 Pounds a month...thats a est. goal of 11 Months! Whew...thats a lot in that short of time. But MyFitnessPal is helping me. Working out every day, and not eating hardly but what I need to have to make it...its such a change! But I'm doing it for the better of myself.

Here we go!

I believe that I can do this...I have a very special, well actually 2 special events happening next year... Gotta get going.

New Orleans

Haha I got him!

Rach and the big man!

So, this past Thursday my best friend came back from Haiti, after visiting her boyfriend, Dorly for a week. :) So on Friday, we decided to go stay in my dad's work apartment for the weekend. Well, we were suspossed to come back on Saturday evening, but we both got sicky and ended up staying another night. We had a lot of fun though. We just sat around the apartment (cause we never knew when one of us would get sick) talked, watched movies, played, and acted silly. I love relaxing weekends! We did go down Bourbon on Friday night...but it last around 30 or so odd mins! Lol. In other words...not our scene! However, we did get some good laughs in!

Enjoy some pics!

Us with our face washes! 

us waiting on the trolley 

Diet Day One :)

Today was the day that I started yet another diet. However, I am more confident than ever! I was so convienced that a lot of the reason from my depressed feelings and anxiety came from my opinion and look at myself. First off I am still looking for a job, and that is depressing in itself! I would never go back on my choice for leaving RFI, that place was awful. However, the anxiety about not having work eats me alive. When I look at myself in the mirror I see a ugly, unworthy, and so much more. Blah blah blah...all of that stuff needs to go. Soon, I will have a job, soon I will lose my weight, soon I will be happy with myself. I know God has a plan for me. Yep...and it started today.

I feel good today, other than being sick. But emotionally I feel good.

Yesterday I went and go diet stuff. I am now drinking ONLY water, crystal light (hungar satisfaction and metabolisim), and some juice. I am eating 1500 or less calories a day...and I feel good!  I am not starving and im not full...just in between. When ever I feel the urge to look in the fridge I drink a water and jog in place or make myself busy doing something active. However, I do have to keep it up! Pray for me! I know its going to be tough!!!!

I cant give up... :) Anyone want to join me in my challange!?? 15 pounds this month! Well 30 days... Here are models or examples of what I am hoping to change... And then be.

Approx. Before

Approx. After (my goal weight)

Whew...here I go!

Damn Doormat

Last night was just awful. I could not sleep at all. I had so much on my mind that I couldn't rest. The sad thing is that for the most part, I didnt really know what was on my mind or why I was so down. I couldn't pick out a reason for myself. However, later in the night, I walked into the kitchen and found something someone had written. And I guess that being in an "already" down mood, it made it ten times worse. I took what that person wrote as..."I am un-welcomed", no longer wanted here, like I needed to hurry up and get a life. Had I really made it that bad for this person to resent me so much? Ok, so not resent...this is just me taking things out of context and reading to deep within the lines...and I hope, know, assume this note really wasnt for me to read and then think all of these things...I hope. But for some reason I feel like I cant walk freely in my own home anymore. Parents home that is...maybe thats why I feel this way. I wish I could move out...I know everyone would be so much happier. My brother could have the bigger room and noone to worry about what he is doing, my mom wouldnt have to argue with me or accuse me. I could come home on weekends to see my dad...he isn't here any other time than that. His job keeps him gone most of the week... She called herself the "damn doormat".

I am not feeling to well today...

Pictures Pictures Pictures...

Tonight John and I had a little fun with the camera....I realized how "unattactive" I really am...

Mission: Loose 50 pounds. Starting Monday, Sept. 13,2010.

Pray for me :)

Blast From The Past!

Today a really good friend of mine, Ashley B, commented on a photo of her, myself, and 3 other of what we called "our crew" on my facebook. Its been almost 4 years from the time that photo was taken, also the last time we all were together, and we keep saying we are going to schedule a reunion...so, I am finally getting my butt in gear and going to try and put on together. Hopefully they all can come!

I cant believe how much all of us have changed, gone our own ways, married, engaged, had children....wow. In 4 years!!! So unreal!

God is good!

A New Day...Out of Control Laughter

Today has gone so good so far. Got my "new" resume typed up and printed, now running around town, here and there, looking for what is avaliable. At the same time, spending time with my best friend. Both of us are in job hunting mode. I dont really like it, however, it is much better than what I was having to deal with at RFI. Now, I have to go file some complaint against them for wrong-doings. My stress weight has been lifted though, thank you Lord.

Today, while driving, Rachel and I had one of our laughing spells. It was awesome! I love it when you laugh uncontrolably, tears running down your face, cant breath, chest hurts, whaling...etc. It gives you a good feeling about life. Its always nice to have someone to do that with. I wish more people could laugh like that more often. The simplest things set our's off. Like today, we were talking and it got silent for just a sec and both of us busted out in the same song, same line, some tone! Who does that?!?! Lol. It was so funny! That laughing session lasted for a good 10 mins. She was driving and literally holding her eyes open with her fingers at the same time...thats a wreck waiting to happen!

I wish you all days like that... :)