Hello again! I am sitting at Starbucks once again, sitting here thinking and so much is swimming through my mind. As I sit here and watch the 6 people in here with me, I wonder what God has going on in each of their lives. One of which is actually the pastor at my church, Patrick. He is busying himself writing and focusing so hard on what he is doing... If only that man knew how much he has impacted me the past few months.
Last night our small group met at Landon and Rachel's and we discussed Ch.2 of Crazy Love. If you have read the book or possibly even my last blog entry you kinda know what we were talking about. I have to say hearing the different storeies and outlooks on life from so many different people and being able to open up about personal struggles is very enlightening. In Ch.2 of the book the biggest thing that stuck out to me is where Francis Chan talks about anxiety. I touched on this in my last entry but I want to expound on it some more. So many times in my life, actually to be honest, just about every day at some point, anxiety or some stressful though takes over my mind in some way. I shared this with the group last night... I have a really hard time waiting and not worrying about the promises God has already promised me. I have a hard time just letting things "be". So in that, I bring more stress onto myself. I don't mean to. I don't want to. But I do. Some of my latest struggles have been with finances (becoming completely debt free, which I am WELL on my way), relationships including not only romantic but friendships as well, prospering at work and wondering if I am really giving it all I can (even when I know I am working my hardest and longest and all), my relationship with God, my family, even something so small as worrying every morning if my car is going to start when I go out to go to work. I'm always worried I am going to forget something or overlook something important. I put a lot of pressure on myself... and truth is, I don't have to. But how do I learn to totally let go and let God? I say that to people all the time. In fact, I also tell people that stressing won't do them any good. Humm... I guess that makes me a hypocrite. God provides us with a way to live a happy life. It's the world that leads us to believe that we can't. I will never forget the time I was downtown Mobile talking with some homeless men and the smiles that came across their face and the belief that they had that no matter what God would take care of them. Now we all know they worried about things... but it was that they professed all the time that they would be taken care of and finding joy in that! And look at me... I have a home, a car, a great job, great family, all the means I need to survive... and I can't sit back and just bask in the fact that God will take care of me. In every way.
But... I WANT to. And I can. And with Gods help... I will. Its a every day struggle. But the most awesome part is that God knows that, see's it, and wants to help. I just have to always call out on him. I don't have to worry. Now, I do have to move and make choices and be active on things that can cause worry and make sure I keep up... I can't just stand dormant. However, if I follow and listen, God will lead me down the right path.
Funny... I am listening to my music while typing this and "Jesus your my firm foundation" just came on... and the song right after is "It's all right"... man God is good.
**Learning to Live Daily With Gods Guidance**
Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you. 1 Peter 5:7
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